Graphic Art that doesn't make me hurl & Black Metal Vegan Chow.

Nacho Ormaechea is a Paris based graphic designer who is making me lean towards graphic art rather than eschew it. I have been trained to frown upon graphic art as a real medium & what I have chosen to do is gag my ego and enjoy.

I had the great fortune of seeing this anomaly recently in Brooklyn. He was one of the judges for the Beard & Mustache Competition and by God this bitch delivered. He is delightful as an icicle piercing your soul in a thunderstorm at the end of a rainbow. Run to the hills bitch.

VEGAN BLACK METAL CHEF:
Tempura Asparagus Sushi
Why no list of ingredients?



I refrained from putting a list of ingredients at the start of this one mainly because it would take up too much time and have too many optional ingredients.



If you want something writen down so you can see easily here it is…





Rice:



Jasmine rice

Sugar

Salt

White Vinegar (or Rice wine vinegar)



The batter/breading:



Self rising flour

White wine

Salt

Garlic powder (optional)



Breading – Panko Japanese breadcrumbs





Sushi Filling



Tempura asparagus

Nori (dried seaweed sheets)

I usually just add some bell pepper, or avocado, or thin pieces of green onion

Flied Garlic (optional…but really good)

Tofutti Brand “Better Than Cream Cheese” (Garlic and Herb Flavor)(more on this below)



Seaweed salad (more on this below also)





Runes, spikes, Ice and Woods…



Someone wrote that I should warn people that the Viking Roll and Black Metal Rolls were a joke and not to eat them….



Should every knife be labeled “do not cut head off with”



Just doing my part to pull the weeds of humanity. If you are smart enough to turn on a computer and find youtube… you should be smart enough to ride this ride.





Lets talk about Tofutti Brand “Better than Cream Cheese” (Garlic and Herb Flavor) for a second.



This stuff…. I keep going back and fourth about.



First thing to be said is that it is pretty much always good on sushi as long as you don’t go absolutely nuts with it.



On other things,like bagels, sometimes I think its terrible and just when I have my mind made up that its really terrible, I will have it on a cinnamon raisin bagel and its really good. So I keep flip flopping on this shit in general but try it for yourself.





On seaweed salad



One person wrote “show us how to make the seaweed salad”!



To this I reply… I dont think I have ever seen the parts of seaweed salad sold separately. I have only seen it as a prepackaged already put together thing.



You can buy it in little packs in the frozen or refrigerated section of your Asian store. Here is another thing where you might have to try out a few different brands. Good Seaweed salad is fucking amazing and you will never leave a place that sells it without having some again. However there also exists bad seaweed salad.



Bad Seaweed salad can be horrible and often tastes like you are licking a large wet dog…not that I know what that tastes like.



So in conclusion… one last piece of advice. Make this shit! It is seriously really really fucking good. I eat this once or twice a month at least Enjoy the fine aroma of your asparagus pee as you peer into the toilet to read your fate of the viking roll you just ate.